One of the biggest milestones in a man’s life is the day he asks those
four simple words, “Will you marry me?” Between movies like The Notebook
and the million wedding boards on Pinterest,
women’s expectations seem
to only be growing when it comes to every detail about their
dream
wedding, including popping the question. So what’s a man under such
scrutiny to do? Well, if you want to build a house, you hire a
contractor. If you want to plan a party, you hire an event planner. If
you want to propose, you hire a wedding proposal planner. Wait, what?
Proposing used to be as simple as bending down on one knee and
praying your girl would say yes, but nowadays, men have a lot to live up
to. With the rising trend in larger than life proposals, it's no wonder
that businesses like
The Heart Bandits, a wedding proposal planning company in Los Angeles, are popping up.
With all of the expectations women have today, men are finally
reaching out for help, and that is where wedding proposal planners, like
Alexandra Van Leer, come in. Leer is an Engagement Agent at the
Four Seasons Resort Scottsdale
and says she's always on the lookout for an amazing way to pop the
question! Leer says she mostly gets her proposal inspiration from a mix
of pop culture, YouTube, Pinterest, personal experiences of friends and
acquaintances and magazines.
A couple of years ago, hot air balloons, fortune cookies, scavenger
hunts and sporting events were the perfect way to go for wedding
proposals, but that’s not the case anymore. The current trend is all
about crowd sourcing. This means getting a group of people together to
participate in the proposal. This requires recruiting people for flash
mobs or engaging in the proposal. The aforementioned Heart Bandits
recently did a proposal in Portland with a man that proposed
on a bridge near a waterfall. They had a group of men break out in a song and started singing "Marry Me" by Train.
Another man on YouTube proposed to his girlfriend in an
elementary school.
So no matter what the elaborate plan you have (or don’t have) in your head, with the right proposal planner, it’s now possible.
Sarah Pease, The
Proposal Planner™ from
Brilliant Event Planning in New York, says, "The most important part of a
proposal is that she says yes!” So your proposal has to be off the charts.
We spoke with Sarah Pease and Michele and Marvin from the Heart Bandits to get insight into the wedding proposal.
Q & A
SheKnows: Do you think it's getting harder to propose because guys want to keep up with each other?
SP: Marriage proposals are following a similar
trajectory as wedding planning — they're becoming increasingly
personalized and customized. It's been said that the wedding day is "all
about the bride" and I think that the proposal is the groom's chance to
show his creativity and thoughtfulness. Many of my clients look me up
because they want their proposal to be different from all the rest —
they need new ways to be creative, similar to people who enlist the help
of a wedding planner to assist in bringing a dream wedding day to life.
HB: I think it is harder for men to reach their
girlfriends' expectations without some help. Nowadays, a man does a
flash mob proposal, posts it on YouTube and five million women send that
link to their man and say "I want my proposal to be like this." Most
men wouldn't even know where to start creating an elaborate proposal
like that.
SK: Is there a secret formula to follow when proposing?
SP: The most important part of a proposal is that
she says yes! Speak from your heart and be genuinely you. That is what
your partner loves about you.
HB: Yes. Don't focus on coming up with a "cool" way
to propose — focus on the details. If you sit and brainstorm about your
relationship, what makes it unique, what is special about you and your
girlfriend and then you base your proposal concept off of that, you
can't go wrong. If you just think of cool ways to propose, then you
start thinking of helicopters and sailboats and your proposal may lack
the sentiment that women love.
SK: What advice would you give to someone who's interested in proposing to their significant other?
SP: Plan ahead. In most cases, you've saved up money
for a ring and it's taken a long time to reach this point. Don't forget
to factor planning the proposal into your timeline — if you're very
lucky, you get to ask this question only once in your life, so focus on
making it personal and memorable.
HB: I would advise them to make the proposal
personalized to the woman. There is a reason why people troll the
internet looking for the perfect proposal idea, but always come up
short. It is because all of the ideas you can find on the internet were
created for someone else's girlfriend! Come up with a proposal idea that
shows her you have been paying attention to her and she will be very
impressed
SK: How do you come up with different and unique ideas specific to each couple?
SP: I have an in-depth consultation with each client
where we discuss all aspects of their unique love story. This session
allows me to take everything I learn and create a totally personalized
proposal inspired by them.
HB: We send our client a very detailed questionnaire
which helps us get to know details about him, his girlfriend and their
relationship. With the information we learn from that questionnaire,
combined with his vision, we create unique and romantic marriage
proposal concepts based on his budget. All of our ideas include those
special details that count.
SK: Have you seen any bad proposals lately?
HB: Wow, where do I begin? The guy who faked his own
death was a pretty bad proposal. A guy who faked a plane crash, then
proposed. It's like, why are you trying to horrify your girlfriend and
then propose... weird. All sports proposals are pretty bad. All cliché
proposals like writing "Will You Marry Me" on a plate and dropping a
ring into the Champagne glass are awful. Terrible!
Tell us
What is your dream proposal? Share in the comments below!
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